Stress and Relaxation

Relaxation

I’ve just had a scalp massage. This is what relaxation feels like.

Keep an empirical list of activities where you actually felt joy. Not where you experienced intense desire, like with a bag of chips or some fast food item, but where you actually felt good while doing it and felt better off even after a while, like with a scalp massage. Boy, I need to get those more often. This will keep you from choosing bone-headed activities for “stress-reduction” - like watching Youtube videos for hours on end late at night or eating five samosas at a go.

Also, remember, the aim is not to reduce stress, the aim is to relax! I think they lead to two completely different feelings. And they’re embodied physically in different responses - the fight-or-flight response vs the relaxation response. Don’t just reduce the number of things that are stressing you out, actually do something that gets you relaxed. Maybe this involves not thinking about the things that stress you.

The American Psychological Association has done lots of surveys that back this up. What we think will reduce stress actually doesn’t, and we neglect to do those things that have actually proven themselves in the past, like meditation, or a real-life chat with friends, or a walk in a green park. These sound too cheesy. They sound like work, sometimes. But, still, they do give results.